Everything that glitters ain’t gold.

We’ve all heard the saying, “everything that glitters ain’t gold.” And I’d imagine we all have various things we can point to where the sentiment applies. It’s fascinating to watch the purity of something or someone fade with time, success, and experiences. To recognize the lack of depth and substance in something that was supposed to reach beyond the surface and have roots planted deep. I think people often get conditioned to want to appear a certain way without doing the work of actually being. If no one pulls back the veil, then who would know. It’s the whole ” you ever see someone post quotes, but you know they are toxic as hell” thing. Like it’s not enough to simply appear to be a good person, a helper, a boss, etc. Because eventually, the bottom falls out, and when it’s all said and done, what are you left with?

I’d decided that I didn’t just want the life that looked good. I’ve always remained true to who I am. Everything I’ve ever done was from a pure place. However, I’d allowed myself to fight past my own intuition to fight for something that was giving what it could but not what I deserved. I don’t care about keeping up appearances or creating a particular perception around who I am. What you see is what you get. You can take it or leave it, like it or love it, but it’s me. I do not care about having access to exclusive places and having nice things. If I’m not happy, what’s it worth? If I’m not enjoying the environments I’m in, if I don’t feel respected or loved in the way I desire or fulfilled by my lifestyle. If the substance lacks and the things that really matter in life are glossed over? What’s it to a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul, right? The instagramable moments mean nothing if once I close the app, all I’m left with is emptiness. I, personally, decided that I wanted to thrive in a way that is authentic to the things that matter to me.

I want to enjoy real friendships where we laugh, cry, grow, experience, and have fun. The kind of friendships where I don’t have to question their loyalty nor wonder if they’ll really be there if I need them. The ones that are reciprocal and refreshing. To be of service in a way that actually yields tangible results for the people around me. To succeed in a way that doesn’t consume my identity as a person but that I can still be proud of. To share a love with someone where Tuesday nights at home cuddled up watching our favorite show or the game is as enjoyable as the big moments. The kind that shares the same desires for a particular type of life with me instead of having to work hard to conform. I think we see a lot of what life is “supposed” to be, but the truth is, we have no idea what it actually is for anyone unless we’re intimately there. So it’s important to fight against the urge to want to be like. We’re all trying to figure it out as we go, and what works for one person might not work for the other. And what you think maybe working for the next person, behind closed doors, might not be working at all. Choose the life you want and accept nothing less than whatever that is. Not everyone will understand it, and that’s okay. It’s not their life to live. So long as at the end of the day, when it’s just you, you can sleep well at night knowing you did your best, were yourself, and are truly happy with the life you’re living, then that’s all that matter.

Don’t worry about keeping up with the Jones’. Half the time, the Jones’ are barely keeping up with themselves. If you knew all the stuff I know about some of these celebrities, your head would spin. Some shit just ain’t worth it. Money buys many things, but it can come at a steep cost if you don’t nurture the other parts of your life, which typically starts from within. So let’s be vigilant against falling for the Okie Doke. Everything that glitters and gold, and just because you’re not in a particular place, doesn’t mean you aren’t exactly where you’re supposed to be. It’s your journey, and you have to be happy with it. So do your thing authentically. Here’s to having hearts of gold and shinning from the inside out.